At WeDentonDoIt we believe in categorization. The complexities of todays modern world often bog down the mind with details. We know that music genres can be complicated and so can music fans. So in an effort to make life a little easier we will break down these societal divides into over-generalized, pretentious labels, to help you identify and relate to the world around you. We are happy to introduce to you the first bro of the week...
Live in Denton long enough and you can count on running into Folk Bro. You may see him in your coffee shop, in the basement of your local pizza restaurant, or grabbing a drink at Dans.
Let's meet the Folk Bro we all know and love/don't love/resent.
First, the obvious. The Folk Bro has a beard. The Folk Bro is his beard. Know the beard, know the bro.
The beard says a number of things about the bro. It says yes and no in so many ways.
"Yes, it tickles."
"No, I don't own a television."
The beard is the Folk Bro`s comfort blanket. Askng the Folk Bro to shave his beard is asking the Folk Bro to give up.
The Folk Bro keeps his visual brand unkempt so people know that social hygiene norms don't own him. The beard may even have gross dreads, natural or man-made. This means the folk bro falls into two categories, a folk bro and a hippie, a fippie. The folk bro knows his beard well and identifies other beards quickly to estimate any potential threats to his authenticity.
"Why shave? Things that make sense fill me with meaning."
Met this bro at the Spune finals show. Nice bro.
The bro wears geographically specific boots, or maybe even shoes that look like boots. The kind that flatter a smoky bar and tight jeans, but not the kind that you want to stomp a rattlesnake with.
And for pants:
And for pants:
Usually blue, maybe black depending on the formality of the event. He might wear black jeans on a date or maybe to his stepbrothers graduation. Not because he cares about looking good at his stepbro's graduation, but because he feels his pants symbolize his hatred toward his stepbrother. His closet looks like a 7 layer flannel dip. Colorful and checkered, he can't wait until winter when he can truly enjoy Catcher in the Rye and smoke real cigarettes. The Folk Bro might appreciate Catcher in The Rye but realize that A Perfect Day For Banana Fish is far superior story.
"Why did mom and dad pay for his college just because he majored in business. Ive been majoring in 17th century French literature for 3 years and no one helps me out."
Off to class!
He keeps a few key friends close by but not too many, as to still keep an exclusive exterior. He might keep a few talented members from other bands around, so in case someone doesn't know he is a big deal, they will by association. This is limited to how legitimate the band is, but there might be an exception, ie. someone with dreads because they are far past hygienic norms. Like cheetahs, they are okay with being in the same vicinity as other Folk Bros, but close proximity lends itself to the frightening banj-off. (Think Dueling Banjos but with Sufjan Stevens covers and kids on student loans instead of frightened weekend travelers and sons of the soil.) When music knowledge and hygiene collide, escape from the conversation. You might find yourself defending deodorant and shampoo.
It's important for the bro to own at least one or two obscure stringed instruments. Maybe a banjo, a hurdy gurdy, an auto-harp, or a ukulele. Where do they find these antediluvian instruments? Blame it on easy access to Wikipedia, Ebay, and the Antique malls on the square.
"Thought it was lame when grandpa brought out the banjo at Christmas, but college has really broadened my prospectives"
Within our local community of folk music exists a hierarchy of nobodies that control the flow of the folk scene. At the top you have the rat kings who oversee their minions, reaping the benefits of "the system" and find pleasantries in the company of many accessible sycophants. A talented bro rises to the top every so often might even receive special booking attention with Spune Productions. The Man, Spune, secures key shows to many of the privately owned folk dungeons, or "venues", around town. If The Man gets hip to their epic, big sky, American folk anthology, falling leaf sound, he might even offer them a recording deal. This secures their position at the top of the DFW music scene as well as a few nominations in the DOMA's. But where does it end for the folk bro? The acoustic vibrations from their banjos only reach so far into the DFWorldroplex. Even though the Folk Bro may achieve moderate success in their local music arena, one question still remains...
How far can these plaid coat tails take me?
Tour with Arcade Fire?
Open for Ryan Adams?
Collaborate with Sufjan?
ARE THESE THINGS EVEN POSSIBLE???
You may be asking yourself why should I care? Well you probably shouldn't but since you have read this far you should know this. The bro is in all of us. Everyone is looking for a bro to chill with.
Accept it....Don't hate, Incorporate.