It's almost Halloween, you guys. Costume parties, candy corn, and good times are gonna be all over the place before the work week is over. Maybe this is the year you finally stop being the Popeye to your spouse's Olive Oyl costume. Maybe you're tired of being a sexy nurse/politician/ocelot/what-have-you. We figured we'd step in and give you a hand. Here's a list of possible costumes for you to blow the lid off of whichever local costume party you plan on attending. The list is full of suggestions of Denton Halloween-specific costumes and how you can put them together. Got an idea for something we didn't cover? Let us know in the comments!
Flat Earth Guy
Y'all know that flat earth guy that lives off of Panhandle St. Get some sort of large, flat disc that you can hoist up with suspenders and have it float around your waist. Paint it blue and green and walk around yelling whatever conspiracy theory comes to mind. Have a level on hand to "prove your point" whenever anyone attempts to prove you wrong. Extra points if you decorate your car, too.
Couple's Costume Idea: Roscoe and Clementine
If you're a dude, dress up like the titular character from the Midlake tune, "Roscoe." Wear the appropriate garb for someone born in 1891 and look really productive - whatever that means. Ladies, accompany your dude as Sarah Jaffe's Clementine from her song of the same name. Look very delicate, change your mind a lot, and float in the air if you have acquired that skill at some point in your life.
Local Farmers Under the Age of 35
Buy some old Levi's and carry around a bunch of eggs. Talk a lot about the way things used to be and just be overly nice to everyone. Leave the party early because it's already 9:00pm and you've been up side the damned sun came up.
Someone Really Into Film Photography
This isn't too far off from the Local Farmers, but different enough to warrant another costume. Buy some raw denim, a Stetson hat, and a nice Filson flannel (this is an expensive costume, y'all). Swing by Denton Camera Exchange (compliment Armand on his hat while you're there) and purchase an old Polaroid Land camera SX-70 (something that isn't too heavy and you can carry with you) and some film. Take photos of people looking directly into your camera making very serious faces.
The Chairy Orchard
Get a green jumpsuit and glue hundreds of small chairs all over yourself. Put a couple of teddy bears on there for good measure.
John Williams (owner of East Side and Oak St. Drafthouse)
Grab a beer, a bottle of whiskey, and a stack of shot glasses. Wear an Oak Street Draft House shirt or sweatshirt, cargo shorts and flip flops. Offer a shot to anyone that you make friends with over the course of the evening. Just kinda be all around awesome.
Frenchy Famous Vans
Head to SCRAP or Hobby Lobby, grab a bright orange shirt and blue paint. Craft an excellent message on your shirt touting the local news, events or a message to a friend. Mow people's lawns even if they ask you not to. Also, walk by people, kiss them on the lips and say, "Now you're Frenchy famous."
Actually, you're probably already going as this, but we're talking about something different. Remember Max Quimby? He was that guy that used to walk around UNT with potted plants balanced atop his head.
A Barley and Board Waiter or Waitress
Just dress appropriately and place small plates of barley in front of people and act as if it is something that is actually edible.
This is pretty easy. Get some Wranglers or frack-site appropriate work wear, a metal pipe and a large hammer. Go into whatever party you've managed to get invited to (or even one that you haven't) hammer your tube into their hardwood floors (at a slant), pour some chemicals down said tube (but make sure not to tell anyone what's in your chemical concoction), and yell, "I drink your milkshake!" Then just go to a different party and repeat.
Turn the above "fracker" costume into a couple's costume by adding in an "anti-fracker." Just follow around a person with the above costume on and non-violently protest them. Buy a Frack Free Denton shirt if you can still get one.